trillium

by louise gluck

when i woke up i was in a forest.  the dark
seemed natural, the sky through the pine trees
thick with many lights.

i knew nothing; i could do nothing but see.
and as i watched, all the lights of heaven
faded to make a single thing, a fire
burning through the cool firs.
then it wasn't possible any longer
to stare at heaven and not be destroyed.

are there souls that need
death's presence, as i require protection?
i think if i speak long enough
i will answer that question, i will see
whatever they see, a ladder
reaching through the firs, whatever
calls them to exchange their lives-

think what i understand already.
i woke up ignorant in a forest;
only a moment ago, i didn't know my voice
if one were given me
would be so full of grief, my sentences
like cries strung together.
i didn't even know i felt grief
until that word came, until i felt
rain streaming from me.